God is listening. He hears our cry for help. He hears our thanks. He is listening.

Psalm 145:18&19

"The Lord is near to all who call upon Him, To all who call upon Him in truth. He will fulfill the desire of those who fear Him; He will also hear their cry and will save them."

For many families who educate their children at home spring is a time to evaluate and plan for next year. It is also the time of homeschooling conventions. I attended two wonderful conventions this year. One hosted by APHEA. So inspiring and encouraging because the speakers share their faith and encourage directly from God’s word. The IDEA convention is also excellent. The speakers believe parents are the best educators of their children. Both conventions offer help and tools to equip parents in educating their children.

This past year has been a very stressful one for our family. I went into the conventions knowing I wished I had done things differently this year, but fairly uncertain about what I should do next year. See I’m really a rebel. No one would know it to look at me, but I don’t like to be told what to do. I want to go with my own ideas. In educating my children this has meant mostly not following a curriculum. I tried, sort of, but never made it work very well, too rebellious, too independent. As I prayed about next year I realized the stress in our life had taken so much energy that our education suffered. I did not have the mental and emotional energy to be creative or even patient too many days. I kept thinking, “By next fall things should be calmer, less stress, I can do it the way I want in the fall.”

At the APHEA convention I was convicted that my children needed to be a higher priority than their education. What would it matter if I put together a wonderful lesson, but missed their heart because I didn’t have the time and energy left for them? On my way to the IDEA convention God spoke to my heart that I needed to pick a curriculum I like and follow it for next year. Even if things are “normal” in the fall I am in a season where I need to put my creative energies into my family, maybe into ministry, not into curriculum. There are families out there who had no choices and made a plan from how they raised their kids. I can rest in their work. I can save my energy for building relationships.

I can rest in Jesus work also. I will never measure up. I will never get it all figured out. Jesus did. Jesus died and rose again for me to have access to all he has. I have access to the throne of Heaven. I have the righteousness of Christ. All I need is provided according to God’s riches in glory. If I lack wisdom I ask, God gladly gives his wisdom. So I will rest in the work of others, for educating my children and for my very existence. I rest in Jesus work for my salvation, here and now, and for eternity.

The wind has been howling outside, not just blowing, really strong, destructive winds for much of the winter. My husband farms so he’s out in it all day every day. It really wears him out. The wind makes things so much harder to deal with at the farm. It’s draining just listening to the storm rage, especially at night as the snow blasts the house as another gust strikes.

I felt as I sang that the winds are blowing in our life, too, harsh winds of testing. The song says “I will not be afraid, I will face the wind”. I thought about hiding in the cleft of the rock, sheltered from the wind. The circumstances may howl but I am safe in God. I don’t know if I need to face the wind or simply hang on and thank Him for preserving me through it. Then I thought of the house built on the rock. I like to remember that it stood firm. You know you sing the song about the foolish man and the wise man. The wise man’s house stands firm. Firm through what? A storm, a storm strong enough to demolish another house! So in the story, Jesus, His Word, God Himself is our rock upon which we build. Building there ensures our house will stand, not that storms will not blow. I always picture this house on somewhat of a cliff, like bedrock. In an area that gets wind this would get the brunt of it. This morning I could not sing that I would not be afraid. I don’t want to admit it but I am afraid. Not scared, not losing my faith, not in danger of my house falling down, but anxious, worried, confused. Fear sneaks in. Fear is at the root of all those things.

My picture went on. The house is on the rock, solid and safe. Around the house I have put a lot of work, sweat, blood and tears into landscaping. There are beautiful large trees planted specially in just the right spot. There are some shrubs, beautiful with fragrant flowers in the spring. On one side there are more evergreens. These not so old, still many years of growing ahead. Near the house are flower beds, cultivated, planned and collected for years. There are benches near the memory garden for quiet reflection. Last of all are the fruit trees. Loved and longed for fruit trees. They were planted a few years ago, tended and protected until they can mature and bear fruit. They are so close. But now the storm! The winds! The winds are raging. They have been blowing for months. I don’t know when they will stop. I don’t know what will be left of my plans and dreams, all my hard work, when they do.

I know I am safe in my house. I know some of the things that are established and secure in my house, my marriage, my children, all our needs are met. But the storm! I can’t stay inside my house and pretend the wind isn’t blowing. Neither can I go out to protect my trees and flowers, my dreams. The storm is too strong. It seems all I can do is wait out the storm and see what remains. What will God preserve for me?

I am not satisfied with this seemingly helpless waiting. Didn’t God tell me to plant those trees, at least some of them? Why would he send or allow a storm to destroy what I planted in obedience? What would it mean if the big trees are uprooted in this storm? What if my fruit trees die? What if I only heard part of the instructions? What if I planted an English garden and I was supposed to plant an oriental one? If God told me to plant the trees can I rebuke the wind? What do I do until it stops? 

I must rest in the One who holds the future, not even in His promises, just in Him. It may be that everything I planted was in perfect obedience. It may also be that it needs to be uprooted to make room for His plans for the next season. Only what is pleasing to Him will survive the storm. That has to be okay. In my house is praise, peace, and rest as long as I remember and trust who my God is. I must hold to Him, the dream giver, not to the dream.

These winds of testing can be winds of refreshing if I remember God is in control and working all things, even this storm for my good. I will be stronger. I will be more confident of His voice. I will be refined. Perhaps I will face the wind.

The wind is blowing like never before. Even if nothing is recognizable when the storm is over, it will be okay. Everything will be okay.

As I come back to this a few weeks later the winds have lessened. The severe storm is over. I can begin to survey the wreckage. Some things are destroyed. It will be a long hard clean-up process. Some things were badly damaged and only time and faith will tell how they can be repaired and survive. There is hope under the destruction. The rock is still there, and the house is fine. The greatest hope comes from knowing God will work it all for my good as I continue to seek Him. As I go about cleaning up I will uncover new growth. There will be new dreams. The clean-up will be painful at times. My faith will be stronger because I have endured the wind.

“Awake, O north wind; and come, thou south; blow upon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out. Let my beloved come into his garden, and eat his pleasant fruits.” Song of Solomon 4:16 KJV

I found this verse when I was looking for the title and artist for the song. What a good reminder that it is His garden after all. What does it matter to me what He does with it? I planted it all for Him anyway.

Awake, awake o north wind,

Awake awake o south wind

Blow over me

Come o winds of testing

Come winds of refreshing

Blow over me

Let the winds blow

I won't be afraid

I will face the wind

I won't be afraid

Excerpts from Fling Wide by Misty Edwards

I am stepping out and entering this article in a scholarship contest for the She Speaks Conference. A conference "about women connecting the hearts of women to the heart of our Father God and that your heart is to serve Him and His daughters, as He leads."

Scholarship information here

She Speaks Conference informations here

"Do not let your heart be troubled." Jesus said. It's our choice. When troubling things come, as they always will, we are told to not let our hearts be troubled. How can that be? Jesus told us in the  preceeding statement. "Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world gives, give I unto you." Jesus gave us HIS peace. Sin and curse overcoming peace. All the troubling things that come at us are because of the curse - the curse Jesus nulified by his life, death, and ressurection. Peace.

Winter is so beautiful. The last two months I have been blessed to be staying in a house where I can watch the sun rise every morning and set every evening, usually while I’m doing dishes. The affects of the sun on the snow and the clouds is spectacular. In certain areas the trees get covered with frost, it’s one of my favorite winter scenes. A full moon on the snow covered mountains is pretty hard to beat, too. There is so much to enjoy, yet how often I grumble about wanting it to be over. Winter has some negatives, cold, dark, ice and wind, to name a few. The spring that is longed for has some negatives often forgotten when focused on winter. Spring can be muddy, wet and cold. It can still snow and freeze. My point is God has placed beauty in every season, even ones that seems full of negatives.

God has placed beauty in every one of your life’s seasons as well. Things can look very dark and feel very much like winter, but there is beauty to be found if you change your perspective. If we look around with thankfulness we will always be able to come up with a list, especially if you start with God, seeing how He never changes, He’s just as good in the winter as in the spring.

Today we woke up to an unexpected 6 inches of snow. Everything is so beautiful when there’s that much fresh snow. It was overcast and everything has a dreamy feel. I absolutely love it. Our devotion this morning was on Jesus making us clean like the snow. He takes my gunk away and cleans me up. “Though my sins were as scarlet they are whiter than snow.”

Later in the day the clouds lifted enough for the sun to shine underneath and light up the world. It’s breathtaking. I sat in wonder at the beauty. I had been enjoying the beauty all morning and now was surprised at how enthralled I was with the sun shining on the white blanket over the trees. I also thought, we are to be like that. We are beautiful, forgiven people. It’s a wonderful thing. But oh when we let the Son reflect off of the righteousness He has given us - Wow! It is an amazing thing to be forgiven and washed whiter than snow. Too often I stay overcast with circumstances or the concerns of the day. The Son has no way of shining on me when I stay under my clouds. He can lift the clouds. He can shine on me in spite of the clouds. He can even blow them away, and then – Oh the glory! What an attraction and wonder to the lost and hurting if I reflect the Son.